I also approach D-day with trepidation. Monday...June 17 at 5pm. I am almost calm, but I am sure I will become nervous and angry. I am anxious to get the 'chat' over with and out of my head and off my chest. I think that is why I might be kinda calm...that I will have the opportunity to get all this anger and sadness and thoughts out of my life. At least I hope it helps.
Saturday, June 15, 2013
Home...another...night at home. A Saturday night. I don't mind Friday so much, but Saturdays are a wrench.
I also approach D-day with trepidation. Monday...June 17 at 5pm. I am almost calm, but I am sure I will become nervous and angry. I am anxious to get the 'chat' over with and out of my head and off my chest. I think that is why I might be kinda calm...that I will have the opportunity to get all this anger and sadness and thoughts out of my life. At least I hope it helps.
I also approach D-day with trepidation. Monday...June 17 at 5pm. I am almost calm, but I am sure I will become nervous and angry. I am anxious to get the 'chat' over with and out of my head and off my chest. I think that is why I might be kinda calm...that I will have the opportunity to get all this anger and sadness and thoughts out of my life. At least I hope it helps.
Friday, May 31, 2013
Friday, May 31
...spent my lunchtime with friends at Urban Table...yummy pancakes and bacon and coffee. I tshsould have something differetnt than breakfast next time...I always have breky.
...spent my morning helping daughter with a break-in in her/my car in Cali. Theft and vandalizsm and fraud. He paid his phone bill with her debit card. Duh. I think he will get caught...don't you?
...part of the day was spent at Lowes, buying some thin concrete block, rebar and concrete mix to make a retaining wall on the south side of my house/patio area. I dug and arranged and then pounded in teh rebar to hold the block in place. Next I must start arranging and placing rock, mortaring them to face the block and make it purty. Then a rock top...like one of those old timey rock walls with the crenelation on the top
...my evening was spent walking with my sister (Kim and I whined about all that happed today. It was good to walk, nonetheless). I also watched my hero Bill Maher and had a Strong Bow. All in all, a productive day...but a lonely night.
...spent my morning helping daughter with a break-in in her/my car in Cali. Theft and vandalizsm and fraud. He paid his phone bill with her debit card. Duh. I think he will get caught...don't you?
...part of the day was spent at Lowes, buying some thin concrete block, rebar and concrete mix to make a retaining wall on the south side of my house/patio area. I dug and arranged and then pounded in teh rebar to hold the block in place. Next I must start arranging and placing rock, mortaring them to face the block and make it purty. Then a rock top...like one of those old timey rock walls with the crenelation on the top...my evening was spent walking with my sister (Kim and I whined about all that happed today. It was good to walk, nonetheless). I also watched my hero Bill Maher and had a Strong Bow. All in all, a productive day...but a lonely night.
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Love my studio at Jewell
Thursday, May 30.
Spent 7 hours in studio at William Jewell. Heaven. I had the room to myself..my student did not show up to work.
Pots:
I spent the day making work as prototypes for more pots and taking care of unfinished pots from Monday.
I made another cup and saucer to get my fingers limbered up...then moved onto cream and sugar containers (I love vessels with lids), a bowl (icky) and the beginnings of a teapot. I got the body, foot and handle completed. The next time I go up I will work on the spout and the lid. I will also make some kind of tray for 'spills'.
I am going to go look at my favorite artists online and on Pinterest for inspiration.
Surface: I am applying rolled surface texture, stamping, sprigs and some rolled lines. I am trying different ways to apply underglaze before bisque firing. I have used a lime green mixed underglaze and flower patterns cut from news paper to make prints on each surface...at least twice on pots...inside and/or outside.
If I get the surface right, these will be gorgeous...I shouldn't let glazing and color, get the best of me. It is soooooooo intimidating!
I wish I could get that HIgby Water Blue to work correctly...when it does it is sooooo beautiful.
I wonder if it has anything to do with the RIOx wash I used to put over my work???
Spent 7 hours in studio at William Jewell. Heaven. I had the room to myself..my student did not show up to work. Pots:
I spent the day making work as prototypes for more pots and taking care of unfinished pots from Monday.
I made another cup and saucer to get my fingers limbered up...then moved onto cream and sugar containers (I love vessels with lids), a bowl (icky) and the beginnings of a teapot. I got the body, foot and handle completed. The next time I go up I will work on the spout and the lid. I will also make some kind of tray for 'spills'.
I am going to go look at my favorite artists online and on Pinterest for inspiration.
Surface: I am applying rolled surface texture, stamping, sprigs and some rolled lines. I am trying different ways to apply underglaze before bisque firing. I have used a lime green mixed underglaze and flower patterns cut from news paper to make prints on each surface...at least twice on pots...inside and/or outside. If I get the surface right, these will be gorgeous...I shouldn't let glazing and color, get the best of me. It is soooooooo intimidating!
I wish I could get that HIgby Water Blue to work correctly...when it does it is sooooo beautiful.
I wonder if it has anything to do with the RIOx wash I used to put over my work???
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
back...back to have a place to whine without anyone asking questions. I went to visit my DBT friends for coffee at Homers in OP. I broke down in front of them. I am fairly despondent today. One of them told me that maybe I could find happiness in being alone. I told her I have heard THAT so many times,
that I am ready to punch someone out who
says it next. I HAVE been alone for 20 years as of June 7...and I just can't do it anymore.
I was 39 and few months. I am now 59 and a few...a couple of boyfriends here and there, but no one who stays. I am always the 'bad guy', the person with the problem they dont want to deal with...nevermind their issues. *I* am the one who is crazy.
I just wanna say 'fuck you' to all of them especially TC. He ruined me...ruined my ability to trust men, to be able to speak up and be myself. I feel like I will never meet or be able to be with anyone the rest of my life. I am too young to live without romantic love the rest of my life.
I don't believe in fate...or god...or karma...or luck...even though I talk about them...curse them. I used to pray once in a while...of course, not getting anything I wanted; like my dog back, my first boyfreind back, unconditional love...
*sigh*
that I am ready to punch someone out who says it next. I HAVE been alone for 20 years as of June 7...and I just can't do it anymore.
I was 39 and few months. I am now 59 and a few...a couple of boyfriends here and there, but no one who stays. I am always the 'bad guy', the person with the problem they dont want to deal with...nevermind their issues. *I* am the one who is crazy.
I just wanna say 'fuck you' to all of them especially TC. He ruined me...ruined my ability to trust men, to be able to speak up and be myself. I feel like I will never meet or be able to be with anyone the rest of my life. I am too young to live without romantic love the rest of my life.
I don't believe in fate...or god...or karma...or luck...even though I talk about them...curse them. I used to pray once in a while...of course, not getting anything I wanted; like my dog back, my first boyfreind back, unconditional love...
*sigh*
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